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History Channel Explanations

I was watching the History Channel yesterday, you know, the channel with nothing actually historic, only speculative.  Haha, it used to be the channel about stuff that happened during the years 1938 through 1945.  Now it’s the channel about stuff that might have happened.  Some shows (After Humans), are about stuff that could happen someday.  Is it the Speculative Future Channel?  Maybe they are turning into the vacancy left by the SyFy *snicker* Channel.

But I digress.

So I was watching this show about the ancient pyramids, ruins in Peru (Machu Picchu, etc), and manna in the Bible, all these mysterious and wondrous artifacts (except manna), and how they were all achieved by alien tech.  Yeah, that’s right, aliens gave us advanced technology to play with thousands of years ago.  I don’t make this stuff up, that’s what the history channel was saying.  It’s a fun speculative show and everybody’s all deep and mysterious.

“These tolerances are impossible, even with modern technology.”

“If someone came to me and said I wanted a stone cut like that, I wouldn’t do it for any price.”

Ooo, spooky.

And it goes on, one breathless expert after another speaking at length about how such feats, difficult to achieve today, would have been impossible thousands of years ago – unless they had help.  Help from aliens.

Yeah, that makes sense, I think.  Just because something seems impossible or difficult you’ve got to pull out the aliens card.  I’m more a fan of Occam’s Razor.  There’s a simpler explanation, one that actually has plenty of evidence in existence today.

It goes a little something like this:  Engineers are not particularly good at documentation.  You can actually stop reading here, because that’s it.

Even in our time, clever engineers fail to document stuff that has to be rediscovered as little as ten years later.  Engineers are so enamored of their works, so convinced at their own brilliance of cleverness, that the construction or solutions are believed to be, by them, self evident.  How could you not know what it does, it’s so simple, they say. There’s an old gripe about how clever programmers always think their solutions are self documenting because they are so elegant and perfect.   The pyramids?  Whatever their purpose, I’m sure engineers of the era couldn’t possibly conceive of someone NOT KNOWING what they do.  It’s obvious.  It’s always obvious to someone, except when that someone has been dead for 4500 years.

Without fail we must rediscover these “simple” solutions over and over again.  Remember, concrete?  The ancient Romans used it all over the place, but its secret was lost for 13 centuries until 1756. “Bah, write it down!?  You must be an idiot.  It’s so simple.  No way is anybody going to forget this.  Oh, shit, the Visigoths!  They weren’t covered in our disaster recovery plan.”

I suppose there’s also the problem that people just don’t have a multi-generation mindset when it comes to passing information forward.  We might think of our kids, but beyond that, it’s all a hazy blur of “somebody else’s problem.”

And bam! You forget how to make concrete.

So, it wasn’t the aliens that gave us awesomely advanced technology to make mind bogglingly beautiful and intricate structures.  We just forgot to write it down and back it up.  “That’s the next contractor’s problem,” they said.


  1. Sigg3

    We are not aware of how many times we have reinvented the wheel. Or concrete for that matter.

    I also share your misgivings for this blatant BS. They tell of a deep ignorance with regards to the potentiality of human beings’ creativity and transcending consciousness. It makes me angry that people don’t believe that people could have build it. But it seems reasonable too, because we are so interested in destroying everything.. *sigh*

  2. Jim O'Malley

    But it makes good TV, huh? Don’t worry your little pretty heads about actually going out and creating something, just sit back there with your beer and hot pockets and let our lazy pseudo-intellectual bullshit wash over you.

    And it’s a shame, but you’re right, destruction seems to be extremely compelling over the short term and it keeps us from realizing significant long term gains.

  3. Fran and Steve

    You see the same crap on Nat G and Discovery. They cater to the lowest common denominator. Every time there’s something on the Nazca lines, the viewer is persuaded to believe aliens were behind them. Hubby and I get so frustrated when we are looking forward to watching a much-typed program, only to be disgusted. You’re right, they present theories as facts or new findings. And if it’s not that, it’s some agenda they’re slyly pushing. Or maybe we’ve become too old and cynical. Fran

  4. Sigg3

    Actually, among the latest National Geographics printed magazines, the Nazca lines were dealt with very thoroughly. Great article, without all the myths (“they can only be seen from the air” etc).

    There was this hack that purports an “Ancient Global Civilization” theory (Atlantis re-visited) and his main argument was something along the lines of: “there are pyramids all across the world, why, and why were they built so similarly?” A very leading question given his agenda.

    I couldn’t help myself but post a comment on the fact that pyramids are the simplest, stable geometrical shapes with space inside.. Which I’d never considered before. It makes sense to make a pyramid. End of mystery.

    • Jim O'Malley

      I always thought the same thing. When I was little and building sand castles (okay, I admit it; it was last week) the pyramid was the default shape, why? Because it was easiest, and it scaled well. Want a bigger castle, just pile up more sand. And we’re giving aliens credit for that?!

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