The whole mess of fraudulent fines is blowing up here now.  The local paper is featuring the story and outrage on the front page.  Through the article, I learned that I can go online and check my driver’s record to see just what fines I supposedly owe.  Okay, cool, I’ll at least be able to see what they have fabricated for my fine-paying pleasure.


Let me repeat that.  The hard copy printed letter on paper, that had to come from somewhere, that had to be generated from something by someone, doesn’t even match what they have in their own database – not even close.

I knew criminals were stupid.

Supposedly, I was driving through red lights hours away in Mayaguez a week after 9/11.  DTOP shows a fine for $30 and no license plate number.  So apparently I was jogging through red lights on the other side of the Puerto Rico with my special jogging sneakers and super powers.  Luckily I had my license so that they could indicate the proper fine for flying through red lights with an invisible car or something.

BAH!  So where does the $120 come from?  I think they just made it up, pulled a number from their collective ass, and called out –

Hah, schenanegans on me.  You kidders you.