Don’t be Afraid, Dude
The most costly of all follies is to believe passionately in the palpably not true. It is the chief occupation of mankind.
– H.L. Mencken
Jesus said, "Dude, relax. It’s not about all this, even though it is. Look, it’s hard to explain, but you gotta lose yourself to find yourself. You’ve gotta give up your salvation to get it. But you know that it shouldn’t be your aim, and believe me I can tell. I’ve got this omniscience thing going on. Do you run up and help the homeless guy because he’s ‘Jesus’? I get that a lot, and I’m all like, ‘Dude, you’ve got eyes, right? He’s not me.’ No, I’m right here. He is a child of mine, though, and I’d appreciate it if you’d help him out but not for me, though. No no. It’d be great if you could help him out for him. Know what I’m sayin’? It’s kinda like that for most things. I’m not all into this mysticism thing. Dad put the universe together to be internally consistent. It doesn’t violate any rules. Stuff doesn’t just magically happen. There’s a process. Dad’s big on process. In fact, he got a little carried away with process, and that’s why he sent me. Had to get back in touch with humanity.
Anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah, Fear. Fear is probably the toughest thing I’ve ever had to deal with, both what I experienced, and what I observed in all of you. Fear is just the worst. It binds up your hearts in ways that you couldn’t imagine. You see, I don’t want you to live like that. Fear really just makes me sad. It’s really hard for me to see people wanting so bad to save themselves that they forget to love, forget to put themselves out there for others. All they want to do is connect to me, worship me, all the while hitting each other with that book. I’ve got mixed feelings about that book, btw. It’s not like I don’t get into it, but I understand the limitation that people have trying to describe life-changing events, changes in direction that come with a profound, transforming, life-altering, some say mystical revelation. I understand that it’s tough to put it down on paper, so I empathize. But some of it is just so wrong. All that stuff about retribution and fire and brimstone – water to wine (I mean, geez, it was there all along, but they had to do the whole, Oh look Jesus turned water to wine. It was really embarrassing. Yikes).
Anyway, so you’ve got these people who are fearful hitting each other with this book like that’s going to solve something. Then you’ve got these other people who are afraid to speak my name for fear of being labeled ‘one of them.’ I empathize with that too. Humans like to bottle up these magnificent soaring attributes of faith, love, devotion, and service into valuable commodities that they can own and keep away from others, thereby increasing their perceived value (I picked that up in a business class I took a while back). So you hoard your little trinkets hoping upon hope that they will appreciate and then you’ll have something of value that your neighbor might not have. Of course the root of all this is that you’re afraid that your future isn’t secure, that your faith might not be the right one, that you’re on the wrong path. By increasing the quantity of like-minded individuals in your little "group" you increase your value. I like to call it Amway Christianity.
Sigh, Dad and I got a good laugh out of that one, but I digress.
So we pre-package up all this magnificent stuff into these little bundles. Let’s call them words and symbols… or better yet, let’s call them gangs. Yeah, I like that. So you’ve got this quasi-believer, somebody who’d fallen away from the faith. Let’s call him an agnostic. He just feels uncomfortable about all these gang symbols. He’s doesn’t want to get gunned down in enemy territory, so he uses safe words like "mojo" or my personal fav "may good thoughts be with you." Jesus! (can I say that?) just say I’ll pray for you, it’s not gonna kill you, and anyway that’s what good thoughts are. Sigh, no really it’s all good.
I
don’t care what color you wear, or what you call prayer, good thoughts,
or mojo. I know what you intend, and what’s more important, I
hear ya, dude. Don’t matter what you call yourself, whether you
don’t like Jesus freaks (actually that’s our team name for a little
basketball league we put together up here… really does a number on
the opposition) ’cause you’re afraid or whether you don’t like gays and
hippies because you’re afraid, because they are subverting society and
the sanctity of marriage. I know, and it’s okay. But I’ve
got to say it just one more time in the hopes that it will sink
in. I made you all (look, if it makes you feel better that you
just sprang into existence, that is perfectly okay with me as long as
you’re not afraid). Better a courageous agnostic than a craven
Christian, I always say. But you know I’m always rooting for that
craven soul, that lost, fearful, small little mustard seed. I
keep saying, grow little seed, grow. Encompass the world.
Show me what you can do. When you screw up – and you will – I
don’t go all retribution like. I keep hoping upon hope that
you’ll put it together and make the shot.
And finally, I don’t fear that you’ll fail. You will. I know that each life lived is an opportunity. It’s your chance to grow that mustard seed of a spirit you have. Whatever you do with it is your choice, but I’d like to see you really come alive out there.
Hey, this has gone on longer than I intended. Sorry about that. What do we do, you ask? Okay, here it is, but don’t tell anyone you got this from me. We’re big on the whole "figuring it out yourself thing" around here. Chalk it up to Dad’s whole "process is important" thing. Whatever.
Whatever light you have that you use on yourself is wasted. Whatever gift you have that you don’t share with others to help them out is wasted. There’s this cool little story that I heard a bit back. In hell (which doesn’t actually exist, but after hearing this, we’re thinking about putting one in just to see if this would actually happen), inhabitants stand with their hands tied to a six foot spoon over a pit of food. The inhabitants are in a perpetual state of hunger because they can’t feed themselves. In heaven (and this is the part I love) it’s the same deal, except no one goes hungry. Everybody feeds each other with their spoons. I don’t know if it’s because they’re less dumb or less selfish. I suspect the latter. That’s it. That’s all there is.
Peace out."