El Gringoqueño

I was watched a little bit of the last auto executives grilling (smoky flavor), and I have to say they were a huge group of clueless morons.  For all the money they make, you’d think they would get the simple things, like:

Your salary is not a prize, or yours for that matter.  Your salary is a reflection of your commitment, responsibility, and risk you assume heading a company. 

As the cookie cutter executives blathered on and danced around a word, a word that was clearly "victim", I began to realize it’s not the market that brought down these companies, it was their clueless CEOs. 

You see, they are victims just like everyone else.  They are just guys, regular guys, employees at their respective companies, paid just like everyone else and worried about their salaries, families, etc.  I’m just a regular joe trying to fix a problem, they seem to say.  This isn’t about me, they say.  It’s about the company.  Please help us.  Help us poor working folks.  You see, I drove here in a hybrid.  Aren’t I special.

You’re not showing me anything special, Mr. Auto-exec.  In fact, I’m starting to wonder why we paid you all that money. 

Let me spell it out for you.  Here’s what happens when things go awry.  You take the hit, Mr. Auto-exec, until such a time as the company improves.  It’s your fault, Mr. Auto-exec.  You get the big salary, as an indication of risk, your responsibility for performance.  You have the most to lose, so you get a big salary.  If things don’t go well, we fire you.  We blame you.  It is your fault.  In some cultures, those responsible parties feel such commitment to their company that they commit suicide.  That’s going a bit far, but in this case I’d like to see top executives stick to a few simple rules.

I’ll call them, Jim’s nine rules to successful leadership at a car company.

1. Drive yourself to work everyday in a base model (or car that your company wants to promote).  Love that car, know it inside and out.  Do your own oil changes.
   
2. Get down in the dirt with the mechanics once in a while.  Walk the production floor EVERY single day in some plant across the country.
3. Sit in on and understand engineering meetings.  If you are not an engineer, use your company’s education benefits and get a degree.  This is not an option at a car company.
4. Sit in on and understand marketing/advertising meetings.  If you are not a marketing person, use your company’s education benefits and get a degree.  This is not an option at a car company.
   
5. Understand the finances of your company.  If you are not a CPA, take some courses, and take the certification exam.  If you are not an MBA (which isn’t very likely, I suppose), get one.
   
6. Stay late at the office and talk to the cleaning staff.  Talk to your designers.  Have lunch with union leadership.  Meet with your plant managers, line workers, dealers, customers, all the time, constantly.
   
7. Give up your salary at the first hint of trouble.  Live off your carefully managed investment portfolio. 
   
8. Take blame yourself in the bad times
9. Give credit to others in the good times

And here’s why:

First, I know he’s not going to enter into illegal wars.  I also like the idea that a leader isn’t the doer-in-chief.  He seems to realize that change comes from the bottom up, and that it is the role of the leader to inspire, nurture, or not get in the way.

I like that.

I also don’t think he has a problem sitting down at the table with Iran, Venezuela, North Korea and having a talk.  How can we turn down the tension, he would ask?  He realizes the strong nation reaches out, makes concessions, looks for peace, and isn’t afraid of diplomacy.  It is the weak nation that stonewalls dialog, refuses to listen, and uses the thread of force as a weapon of first resort. 

When I picked up my little dog Billy from the street, he was a nervous little crazy nut.  He was nippy and erratic, a little lunatic.  I reacted to him with anger and authority.  I tried to cow him into compliance.  It just made him more insane.  Then I realized if I spoke softly to him, stroked him gently, put myself on an even plane with him, he was much more reasonable.  It didn’t take anything away from me.  I knew I was still in charge, but if I could make him feel like he was a little bit more in control of his domain, it made all the difference.

I think Obama understands that.  He’s multi-ethnic, multi-cultural, well traveled.  I think those things give you a perspective on the world that makes you less afraid.

I’ve had discussions about the "illegals problem"  I always ask what is this problem?  It doesn’t seem to be a problem to me.  At some point, the erosion of the English language is mentioned.  I would ask again "Okay, so what is the ‘language problem’?  What is this problem? I need to know, because it doesn’t seem to be a problem to me."   Thinking the "problem" self-evident, we end up devolving into game saying and catch phrases gleaned from talk radio, until finally when all is exhausted, out comes the final appeal to authority,"they broke the law."

But it’s just fear, fear that they are bad, and they are bad because you don’t understand them.  I get the impression from Obama, that he sees lack of understanding as an opportunity to understand.  He may not be fully informed on all issues, but he’s not fearful about getting to know them.  He might not speak Spanish, or Farsi, or Arabic, but I think he’s willing to accept that those people are just like our people.  We aren’t that different.  And we shouldn’t be afraid.

That’s the key.  I’m sick and tired of politicians pandering to fear.  Elect the Dems and it’s a vote for terror!  Elect the Dems and dirty Mexicans will overrun the border, take your jobs, and marry your daughter!  Elect the Dems and the economy will stagnate further, turn to socialism and your lives will be over… or worse, be like Europe.

Bah!  Obama says, your future can be as bright as you want it to be.  He says, I’m not going to pander to your fears.  I’m going to be fearless.  I’m going to be a black man running for president in a still decidedly racist country.  I’m not afraid.  You shouldn’t be either.

What the republicans won’t tell you, and this is their dirty little secret:  Lowering taxes does not help the economy.  Raising them doesn’t either, but that’s neither here nor there.  The secret is this:  hope builds the economy.  When people have hope, when they see a future that looks bright, they create.  They build.  They grow.  That is why the economy booms.  Right now the economy is in the tank because people are afraid, and the current leadership doesn’t want to give up that tool of oppression and control.  A vote for McCain is a vote for fear, a vote for more foreign wars, more erosion of the Constitution, and a continued lessening of the collective national spirit.

Obama, I think, has this idealistic, audacious child-like hope, not dashed by fear, not crushed under the heal of bureaucracy.  The grownups at the table might snicker at his audacity, "Son, you just don’t get how the world works, do you?  Let the grown-ups handle things, okay?"

Obama, "And how’s that been going, hmm?"

I was surprised to find out today that Barack Obama isn’t being truthful about his Iraq War Voting record.  I know I know, I’m bummed.  I liked the guy.  Up until today I would have supported him.  Maybe I still do.  But I’m not so sure anymore.  How can people be so disingenuous about such big issues?  And why has no one else mentioned this.

Barack Obama may have opposed the war in 2003, but he never voted against it.  What?!  You heard me right.  He never actually voted against it.  Why?  How? Wha?

He didn’t vote against the war, because he didn’t become a senator until 2005, that’s why.  When the debate and vote on whether or not there were weapons of mass destruction, or whether or not we would go to war with Iraq, Barack Obama was a state representative (local state politician, not national), for the 13th District of Illinois.  He wasn’t there.  He was just a twinkle in his Senate seat’s pants.

What!?  How could this be?  Haven’t we heard about how he was right from day one.  What was day one for him?  How can you be right from day one when your day one didn’t start until January of 2005? 

If we are going to elect people on their ability to be "right" then elect me.  I said in 2002 there were no weapons of mass destruction.  I said we shouldn’t have gone in.  Check this post. I wrote that back in March of 2003.  I knew it was wrong.  Props for Obama as an armchair foreign policy quarterback, but it sure as hell isn’t anything upon which to base your complete campaign.

I like the guy, but if he wasn’t a member of Congress, he had nothing to lose by taking that position.  I had nothing to lose.  I had no authority.  He had no authority.  I had no access to classified intelligence.  He had no access to classified intelligence.

Now, as far as I’m concerned, Obama based his opposition to the war on a hunch.

Sounds remarkably like our current president, doesn’t it?

A short skit to read in the style of Monty Python’s Cheese Shop

Bush:  As a member of the axis of evil and state sponsor of terrorism, Iran is actively seeking nuculer weapons.  

Press: Do you have proof?

Bush: Why of course we have proof.  It’s how this administration operates.  We operate in the realm of truth. Truth is - well - truth.  If it wasn’t truth, it would be lies, and we do not lie.

Press: May we see it?  This proof?

Bush: Well, it’s classified, but trust me.  We have it.

Press:  Well, I have here in my hand an intelligence report which details that Iran stopped its nuclear program in 2003.

Bush: Ah, I see.  Well, there is that, I suppose.  But I’m afraid it’s a bit overstated.  You see.  They WERE actively seeking weapons of mass destruction and may do so again.  If they restart, which is probable, they could have them in a few years.  They could then use them to attack.

Press:  You just told us that they were actively engaged in a program to build nuclear weapons.  We now find out that they stopped and are not seeking to build nuclear weapons.  How is that truth?

Bush:  Ah, well, I did say that, didn’t I.  Look, this President defines "thinking about building nuclear weapons" as part of the process of obtaining nuclear weapons.  You see, you have to think about it. That’s research.  Some of that research could go on in the heads of scientists.  Who am I to say that they are not thinking about it actively right now?  Can you say what they are thinking about?  They could be thinking about it.  And that’s enough for me.  It could be a threat to the US or our interests if the Iranians are thinking about building a nuclear weapon.

Press: …

Bush:  You see.  Thought leads to action.  If you are thinking about something, then you are actively engaged in the process of doing it.  It is my job as Commander in Chief to head off these programs of thought that exist to destroy the United States.  Would you rather that we go about our business while they think their dirty little terrorist thoughts?  I don’t think so.  That is why I reserve the right to think about attacking Iran for their dirty little thoughts.

I shall forever honor the tip of the sword, for how could I but honor such a perfect edge. It is as clean and sharp and brilliant as anything has ever been. No, my rancor is held for the dirty paw that wields it with such vulgarity and dishonor.

I am frequently asked if I would spit on the blade for its acts, its dealing of death, its bloodshed, or its willingness to do violence. What sort of fool asks such a thing? It does what it was designed to do: slice and slay.

Ah, but to throw hot spittle unto the beady-eyed twit that waves it around like a bright red banner, a beautiful sash to adorn his craven soul. If I could but spit in his eye, I would.

For the generation of swords whose surfaces are pitted with rust, dripping wet with the saliva of the masses, I spit on this troll for you.